“Are you the One” is one of my favorite parts about Monday.
Is it sad? Maybe. Sorry this is coming so late, I know a lot of people look
forward to this. However lets kick this week off with why I am mad at the group.
I mentioned last week that I was kind of cheering against
the million dollar pay off because these kids are gonna become millionaires and
find the loves of their lives. It is horseshit.
However, these people are growing on me. So , for I’m still
kind of cheering for them. Except for
Brandon. I hate Brandon.
Why do I hate this stranger? Well he sucked this episode. First, he said no one was a strong couple
after only getting two lights in the light ceremony. While that may be true, he
just seemed bitter at these couples because he can’t find someone to love him. Second,
after the Truth Booth revealed he wasn’t a match with Alexandra (see below), he just started macing
on Christina and took her to the Boom Boom Room. Third, he called John a pussy
for asking to kiss a girl because he was jealous.
I respect anyone who asks to kiss a girl in an awkward
situation. It may be awkward, but misreading signs is more awkward. Plus John
is from Chicago. I respect him.
That wasn’t the only drama this week.
So that awkwardness between Nathan and Shelby became even
more awkward after Shelby picked Dario in the light ceremony. Nathan handles
the heartbreak like most people; telling Shelby he doesn’t need her. Smooth
move.
Sadly the days of drinking seem to have finally caught up
with Nate Dogg and he has a mental love break down while corning Shelby. Dario
didn’t handle this well, and decided to cut in and put his arm around Shelby.
He then claimed“(he’s) just there to listen”.
Nate would eventually go up to his room and cry about it
some more. Someone should have told him “Are You the One” is more than just
about finding love. IT IS A WAY OF LIFE !
In other couples news, Leyton and Jenni are falling apart after
she chose Anthony (Chi Town represent) in the light ceremony. She goes back and forth on it, but decides it
may be the right move after Leyton said some douchebag things.
Anthony jumped on the opportunity to take advantage of a confused
Jenni by put her up against the wall and started making out with her. Total sober move there.
After all the drinking it is nice regular effects are
starting to show : crying, saying terrible things, and making out uncomfortably
against walls.
THE CHALLENGE
This challenge sucked. People played Pictionary but licking
food paste into pictures instead of drawing them . It was called Lictionary. I
fucking hate the Challenge part . The love I have for the Truth Booth is
nowhere near the hate I have for the Challenge.
Winners: John and Christina , Brandon and Alex , and another random couple.
Truth Booth –
I love the Truth Booth, but I hate how these people are
using the Truth Booth. It is like a teenager with an iphone.
For the third week in a row Brandon was voted in with the
girl he went on the dream date with. The strategy became “well, he has to be
matched with someone”. That logic is the
worst. These are the people who voted for Bush in 2004 because “hey it couldn’t
be worse.”
Him and Alexandra were skipping rocks on their date. That
hasn’t been cool since 1900. Fact. I knew they weren’t a match, and no amount
of games of Lictionary can change my mind.
Also, partners for the challenges are supposed to be picked
with the one who have some chemistry with. However, Brandon just picked someone
random because he lost the love his life last week. It was a desperation Hail Mary.
I was so mad my new favorite couple Christina and john weren’t
picked. John broke some girls nose on the first episode, but was quiet last
week. He goes on this date and realizes it is awkward that this girls old love
is creeping on them the whole time. He played it cool and asked if he could
kiss her (like a gentleman) and she loved it.
Another way to prove John is cool is by how he handled the
Boom Boom room incident I mentioned before. John heard it was going on and he
cockblocks for his million dollars. Brandon would have been crying, but John
takes action. Respect.
At the light ceremony, there were three things I liked:
- John explained that “there is a difference between being a
gentleman and a pussy” after Brandon called him out for asking to kiss
Christina.
- Tyler was the one left out and she was upset by it as more
and more people basically she is hot until she starts talking.
-Ellie was picked.
Good news 3 lights went up and bad news no one knows who is
the matches.
MVP
John
I am usually not a fan of cockblocks, but cockblocking for a
million dollars is cool in my book. Especially when he is cockblocking Brandon.
I kind of hope Brandon gets voted off. Plus he handled the awkwardness of
Brandon well. Plus he is from Chicago. Him and Anthony have an unfair
advantage. As well as Ellie.
Runners up: Ellie and Anthony
Until next time people or until I get sick of watching,
which could be soon with how Brandon is acting.
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